Spectacles
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Krátky popis
When I began writing this book, I went home to see if my mum had
kept some of my stuff. What I found was that she hadn't kept some
of it. She had kept all of it - every bus ticket, postcard, school
report - from the moment I was born to the moment I finally had the
confidence to turn round and say 'Why is our house full of this
shit?' Sadly, a recycling 'incident' destroyed the bulk of this
archive. This has meant two things: firstly, Dear Reader, you will
never get to see countless drawings of wizards, read a poem about
corn on the cob, or marvel at the kilos of brown flowers I so
lovingly pressed as a child. Secondly, it's left me with no choice
but to actually write this thing myself. This, my first ever book,
will answer questions such as 'Is Mary Berry real?', 'Is it true
you wear a surgical truss?' and 'Is a non-spherically symmetric
gravitational pull from outside the observable universe responsible
for some of the observed motion of large objects such as galactic
clusters in the universe?' Most of this book is true. I have, of
course, amplified my more positive characteristics in an effort to
make you like me. Thank you for reading.
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